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There is a conversation that almost every family knows they should have \u2014 and most keep finding reasons to postpone. It involves questions about what a loved one wants if they become unable to speak for themselves. What kind of care do they want? What don’t they want? Who should make decisions on their behalf? Where do they want to be?<\/span><\/p>\n These questions feel heavy, especially when the person at the center of them is sitting across from you at Sunday dinner, seemingly fine. But the discomfort of having the conversation is far smaller than the burden of not having it \u2014 because when a health crisis arrives, decisions still have to be made. Without guidance, they fall on family members under enormous stress, often with family members disagreeing, and sometimes on medical teams who don’t know the person at all.<\/span><\/p>\n